Seek for the LIGHT

Goodbye my blog!

2012-01-01T10:35:00.002+08:00

Assalamualaikum.

Today, I want to say something sad. Well, I'm no longer going to update this blog.

Sad isn't it? Not really.. Hee

I'm writing on a new medium which is http://langitilahi.com/

I update one article per week on this website. English Column yaw!

I'll also share new short stories and poems here.

I can't afford to update two sites at a time. I'm only human.

So, guys, meet me and my friends at http://langitilahi.com/!

May Allah bless!

English Column: How’s your Ramadan?

2011-08-19T10:18:00.002+08:00

“Don’t lose hope, still have time”
Picture by Shattered Infinity
http://www.flickr.com/photos/simplyshutterbug/5349882579/in/photostream/

The very question that whenever people asks us, we cannot answer. Even if we answered it, the answer we replied is not an honest answer.

What is the question then? The question sounds like this “How’s your Ramadan?”

I do not know what will you answer, but for me, whenever anyone posts me that question, I’ll answer between two answers. Answer number one will be a long silence and a nod in the head whereas answer number two will be “Ok laa…” (in Manglish.)

If you can answer like this “My Ramadan is great!” I’ll give you my respect of honour because that answer indicates that you have fulfilled what is asked in this hadith:

“Whoever prayed at night in it (the month of Ramadan) out of sincere Faith and hoping for a reward from Allah, then all his previous sins will be forgiven.” [1]

What is asked in the hadith above? Two things; one, you have prayed at night of Ramadan with full of sincerity only for Allah and two, you have been hoping like mad for Allah to shower His reward for you.

By saying “My Ramadan is great!”, from my point of view, you are actually saying that “my sins have been forgiven.”

It is not that I cannot answer it; it is because I don’t have the guts to say “My Ramadan is great!” I’m simply just a coward to say it.

Why?

Judging from how I treat Ramadan until today that is the 18^th of Ramadan, I surely know that Allah has not forgiven my sins.

For today’s article, let us ponder, “Do you think Allah has forgiven our SINS?”

Help me! I’m slowing down!

2011-08-12T23:57:00.001+08:00

“Help me! I’m slowing down!” says the rabbit
picture by TIO… of flickr.com

Have you ever experienced you set your alarm clock at full volume for Sahuur, but you end up waking up when the light of dawn (or even dhuha) is shining in your eyes and the feeling of depression and hunger that you just missed your only appetite of the day?

Can you still remember the moment when you’re fasting; you were so thirsty and hungry and tired that you were so disturbed, intimidated and annoyed by the presence of non-fasting people eating with full of pleasure in front of your eyes?

Can you remember again the time when you spent all day long thinking of what you are going to eat for iftar and then after iftar you felt bad because you missed a day of rewards? I am sure that you remember the sinking feeling when you went back to sleep after Subuh, and woke up late for work/class in the mode of not-in-the-mood for anything plus being lectured by your mom for wasting half of the day?

Have you ever felt so energetic for the first ten days of Ramadan you could finish more than 10 juz of the Quran but towards the middle and end of Ramadan, you can’t continue on reciting and you just don’t know why?

Answer these questions honestly, reply “ T_T “ for yes and “ ^_^ “ for no. No need to answer it to me. Answer it in your heart and let it be a little secret between you and Him.

I’m not being all great here, frankly, this is what I’m feeling and experiencing this very instant as we approach the 12th of Ramadan. “Help me! I’m slowing down!” Are you experiencing the same as me, love?

(Read more)

English Column: Our hopes in Ramadan

2011-08-06T09:00:00.002+08:00

“My hope is to be free from SINS!”

Picture by ~JosCos of deviantart.com

I’ll tell you the truth about Ramadan. What is the truth? Ramadan is our visitors. Not an ordinary visitor but VVVIP. Ramadan is a visitor that brings a lot of fortunes. But the question is:

How do we treat Ramadan?
It is already day five, have we treated it wholeheartedly?

Let us look back the hadith that is often repeated every year again and again, time and again:

“Whoever fasted the month of Ramadan out of sincere Faith (i.e. belief) and hoping for a reward from Allah, then all his past sins will be forgiven, and whoever stood for the prayers in the night of Qadr out of sincere Faith and hoping for a reward from Allah, then all his previous sins will be forgiven .”[1]

Here, the hadith is translated as “hoping for a reward from Allah” for the word “ihtisaba”. But the literal translation of “ihtisaba” is not “hoping for a reward from Allah” but is “counting.”

What does it mean by “counting”? What are you “counting”? The mathematical equations that you are “counting” are how you treat Ramadan.

Hadith ihtisaba

There are several narrations that narrates the hadith on ‘ihtisaba’, I’ll list three of them.

(Read More)

Let’s get ready to rumble!

2011-07-29T09:28:00.001+08:00

Let’s get ready to rumble!
by Ameen Misran

While browsing through my old 4310 Acer notebook, I saw a picture of the Musolla of my ex-high school, MATRI. Then I looked at my desk calendar. Today is 27 Syaaban and I am 3 days away from Ramadan. Will I manage to enter the doors of Ramadan? Last year, our beloved Ustaz Asri of Rabbani passed away before entering Ramadan. What about me? I don’t know. I just don’t know.

Gazing at the picture brings me unforgettable memories when I was in high school. It has been almost four years since I’ve finished my studies at that school near the woods. I can assure myself, to me, MATRI is the best place to celebrate the festival of deeds during Ramadan. Comparing the places I’ve been in my life, no place can challenge the beauty of the people nurturing Ramadan. No place, not even IIUM Gombak.

In MATRI, from morning to midnight, the Musolla was so full of students reciting and praying. After Terawih prayer, many circles, big and small ones was making Tadarus Al-Quran. Finishing the Quran more than 3 times in one month was a norm in MATRI. But my past Ramadan, finishing it once was the maximum number for me and I was among the minorities. I feel peace and tranquillity seeing the students competing with each other and to some extend making contests to win who finishes the Quran first. Huh! Old memories.

In that picture, there was a picture of my former senior and former xifu, Ustaz Muhtad. A great guy who finished his studies in University Al-Azhar, Dumyati, Mesir. He was staff of MATRI teaching Arabic. He was also the warden of Huffaz Dormitory at that time.

I sunk deep in my thoughts. A memory took place five years ago went rolling my head.

Click here to read more ^_^

English Column: Lose Yourself in Ramadan

2011-07-22T12:23:00.000+08:00

Want to understand nature? Lose yourself in it.
Picture by Umar Aziz at DQ lake

“Ramadan is magic. It can change my whole life in an instance” says a friend of mine to me. ‘Magic’ he says. Nice choosing of words yeah. Ramadan is ‘magic’ only for those who nurture and the thirst of 11 months waiting is only quenched upon Ramadan’s arrival. You will never wait for it to come to your door step and knock on your door, but your door is already open and you’re more than ready to welcome it with open arms. Ramadan is magic because of the Quran.

The majestic Quran and the month of Ramadan

The Quran loves Ramadan and Ramadan loves the Quran. The two of them are beloved friends, no, they are ‘lovers’. Lets understand why the Quran is important first then what it has to do with the Quran in Ramdan. Allah has proven their ‘love’ to each other in the Quran:

“The month of Ramadhan [is that] in which was revealed the Qur’an, a guidance for the people and clear proofs of guidance and criterion. So whoever sights [the new moon of] the month, let him fast it; and whoever is ill or on a journey – then an equal number of other days. Allah intends for you ease and does not intend for you hardship and [wants] for you to complete the period and to glorify Allah for that [to] which He has guided you; and perhaps you will be grateful.” (Al-Baqarah: 185)

For those who read the Quran while fasts combines two powerful entities, Ramadan and the glorious Quran. So, those persons therefore will live this holy month with the Noble book and following what Allah has said. What Allah has said? The Quran is a reflection and reminder to us:

“[This is] a blessed Book which We have revealed to you, [O Muhammad], that they might reflect upon its verses and that those of understanding would be reminded.” (Sad: 29)

But why sometimes or most of the time we read the Quran but we feel nothing? Let’s reflect from this verse:

“Then do they not reflect upon the Qur’an, or are there locks upon [their] hearts?” (Muhammad: 24)

It is either between we don’t understand the message or we haven’t at all tried to understand. The other possibility is Allah does not want us to understand, that is the most feared thing in life. The thing ‘lack’ in our hearts is preventing ‘light’ from coming into our hearts. Erase that ‘lacks’ and ‘light’ will enter.

Click her to read more ^_^

English Column: A love greater than Allah’s love

2011-07-15T12:58:00.001+08:00

“looking for a greater love”
Picture by ~Saaruhh of deviantart.com

“Is it wrong to be in a relationship?”

“It is Allah who made us in love, not us; are we to be blamed?”

“If I don’t have an intimate relationship with her, how will I know my future wife?”

These are typical answers claimed by many people as an excuse to legalize their so called love out of the wedlock. Sadly, majority of us are implementing it.

These excuses are left unanswered. The truth is still hidden from them. Whether being in a relationship out of the wedlock is haram or halal? Who is going to make them understand that what they are doing is wrong? Their parents? Friends?

For those who are close with the Quran and Sunnah, you are so close to the truth. But for those who favour ‘scholarly’ opinions from entertainment magazines, romance movies or music videos, you are so deep in the darkness of ignorance.

The Quran and Sunnah are two substances for us to shape our personality, route map for our life’s road journey and as a shield detaining ourselves from being influenced by the tempting and seducing worldly pleasures. “I leave behind me two things, the QURAN and my example, the SUNNAH and if you follow these you will never go astray” (Narrated by Imam Malik)

But why, with the Quran and Sunnah present alongside our life, we still claim there is a Love Greater that Allah’s love? Who is to be blamed? Is it the Quran and Sunnah or ourselves?

Click here to read more ^_^

Marriage is mirage

2011-07-12T12:05:00.000+08:00

"You and I are different" picture by jeyminems of deviantart.com

Marriage is the most awaited moment,

many people switch to fast forward for that particular moment.

Marriage is the proof of love between two people,

no matter how they look, crossed eyes or full of pimples.

Love does make the world go round,

and love certainly heals all wounds.

But I, I do not feel happy for this so called marriage,

to me marriage is a mirage.

I'm too scared for that moment to come,

I'm too chicken to be called a husband or a father.

To be honest, I can't even afford my life,

so what will I give to my future wife?

It is difficult, so difficult to maintain another life besides my own,

I better of living alone.

If Allah wills, I wanna be a bachelor all my life.

If you wanna say I'm a coward young man, then so be it!

I am coward!

For my future wife, I do not know when will I be ready,

do you think you can still wait for me?

TAQWA: The "Boring" Weekly Call

2011-07-01T08:18:00.000+08:00

“See what happens when we miss an important call”
Picture by *04young of Deviantart.com

FRIDAY is the most exhausting day of the week. Even though I do not have classes on this day, sleeping half a day will always be my top priority. Study? Rarely. Breakfast?Hardly any. Just sleep and sleep. Exhausted I guess.

When the clock strikes 1 pm, I would get ready for prayer, Friday prayer of course. Walk to the IIUM Masjid and wait for the first azan. After an interval for about 10 minutes, the khatib gives salaam and then the second azan is heard.

The azans normally sounds beautiful like a lullaby making the Friday jamaah feel so sleepy. When the azan is over, the khatib starts his khutbah. As the khatib starts with:

“O you who have believed, fear Allah as He should be feared and do not die except as Muslims [in submission to Him].” (Ali-Imran: 102)

I witness in front of my eyes, most of the guys, head down! Their head goes up and down not indicating that they understand what the khatib is saying, but because they doze off to dreamland!

Why are they sleeping? Why are we (men) dozing off? If the purpose of Friday prayer is a place for men to ‘rest’ then, sleeping will be quite acceptable.

But Friday prayer is a weekly call for TAQWA. Is this call a ‘boring’ call?

Click here for more ^_^

Have you swallowed a dictionary?

2011-06-25T13:16:00.000+08:00

If you can’t swallow it whole then eat it!

Picture by Lala (Shady Lane Studios) of flickr.com

“If you have one thousand words in your head, then you will have no difficulty in speaking Arabic” my father said as he taught one of his classes. I was just there to see him teach. It wasn’t my class actually, my father is teaching a senior class in Sekolah Agama Taman Sri Pulai.

One of my weakest subject was Arabic language, I can’t even write properly, what more if I speak Arabic then? It’ll definitely sound like trash. But what he said just now made me feel that he is challenging me. The challenge was to speak Arabic fluently. Do I dare to speak Arabic?

So I grew up still I can’t master Arabic that good but at least I can speak or sometimes debate in Arabic language. I tried to apply what my father said by memorizing all the words I can. I listened to lectures and tried by very best to use the language.

In my own words, I came out with a solution for a person to excel in language; the solution is to ask yourself “Have you swallowed a dictionary?” (Thanks to my dad of course)

Click here for more ^_^

The battle to heaven

2011-06-19T13:28:00.000+08:00

Look at the picture, what do you see?
If you see only twigs that you’re not looking properly!

I see twigs yes but I can see so much more!
I see a ‘battle to heaven’ and what I’m looking for!

If twigs are strong and lively,
will dead leaves grow sadly?

When the twigs are dry,
the leaves clinging onto it cannot cry.

They are crying alright,
but crying without tears all day and night.

Dry waterless as the dead twig,
useless like people who talk big.

I don’t want my life to be in drought!
Because my heart will be in doubt!

I want my life to be full of watery full of water,
Water is a source of life for me to treasure.

This is the battle to heaven!
We do not want our life to be rotten!

If I am before Allah, rotten!
I do not know whether I will win this battle to heaven!

But when I try my best to attain His Rahmah!

I will enter Jannah!

“One day your life will flash before your eyes, make sure it’s worth watching”,
I will, because on that day, I will enter heaven!

Click here for more ^_^

Bachelor of Taqwa from University of Ramadan

2011-06-17T22:44:00.000+08:00

“That is Taqwa!” Picture by ~theForlorn of deviantART.com

On the tenth of Eidul Fitr, two old friends decided to meet each other. They wanted their special meeting to be at a special place, which is at their previous high school. It’s kind of killing two birds with one stone, missing a buddy and missing a school. With the combination of both, it brings back old unforgettable memories.

So they meet up at the musolla of the school.

“Assalamualaikum broer!” says Ameer to his old friend. “Long time no see. How have you been?”

The two of them hugged each other.

“Waalaikumussalam!” answered Ali “Yeah, it has been some time. I’ve been good.”

The both of them had a chit-chat over some old stories. Then Ameer asked Ali a question “You just graduated right from IIUM? What was your bachelor? Bachelor of English was it?”

“Me? Bachelor of English? No. That was a long time ago. Now I have a bachelor of Taqwa” said Ali confidently.

“Bachelor of Taqwa? From what university?” Ameer confused.

“From University of Ramadan” says Ali.

Click here for more of this post ^_^

This is your final Ramadan!

2011-06-11T07:51:00.000+08:00

“Do we have a second chance?
Picture by D.Jelen of flickr.com

“Ameen! Sahur time! Come down, let’s eat” says mama to me. Cold it was at that time approximately 1 hour and a half before Subuh. There I sat in my Sajadah, reciting some Dzkir, just finished two rakaah of Tahjud, but looking forward for more.

I wasn’t really hungry but I was thirsty, thirsty for my ‘date’ with Allah. I need to quench that thirst, if not I will regret my life not able to capture that instant. Ramadan comes only once a year and there should not be a moment to be lost.

“Thanks mama, I’ll be down in 40 minutes” I responded half shouting.

“Okay” she replied. My little brother was with her. She has company so I don’t have to worry.

The next prayer I’m about to perform is Solah Taubah. It was dark. I love praying in a dark environment, it gives me the khusu’ in my prayer. It also centers my attention to only Allah and me alone in that darkness. It really symbolizes a ‘date’ of two lovers. This is the darkness that brings me to light. So I stood up back again facing my Lord in that darkness.

So I said my lafzu niyyah before prayer. Then I made my takbir ratul Ihram, at that moment, my whole body feel so cold, as cold like the South Pole. So cold. As if someone is watching me from behind. I tried to ignore that feeling. I kept continuing my prayer.

As I went on, losing myself in prayer, my body reached under zero temperature. So very cold. I really felt like a dark figure is behind me. Like that figure or someone is trying to do something to me. “Why not just strike me now?” my heart says.

Do you know the figure who I felt was standing behind me? It was like Malikul Maut. I really really thought that it was my time to go. I will leave this world. I will leave my mother without me eating Sahur together. Death will not be delayed not even a single split second.

“Why not just strike me now?” What am I thinking? Am I ready to meet Allah? I’m speaking as if I’m ‘fit’ and ‘ready’ to go. No no! I’m still not ready; I don’t even know when I will be ready. Please Allah! Don’t take me now. I don’t want this to be my final Ramadan!

Click here for more ^_^

The sky is cryin', are you?

2011-06-03T20:33:00.002+08:00

The sky is cryin’, are you?
Picture by Masterpiecestudios of flickr.com a.k.a my big bro

“Why can’t I cry?” I said to myself on the sajadah, longing for those tiny droplets to run free from my eyes. But it seems impossible to do so, just impossible. I’ve tried but it’s still not working.

“Why? Why it is so hard?” I stood up from where I sat and went to the mirror to see myself. Through the reflection of the mirror I see the body Allah has borrowed for me. I tried again crying in front of the mirror wanting to witness myself crying. But no. No physical change. No sad face. No heart pumping hard. No nothing. Just my old stiff face full of ignorance. 22 years of ignorance? Maybe. It freaks me out becoming the owner of a dark rusty heart.

Why am I craving so much for just crying? Isn’t crying a sign of weakness? Because only women cry and men don’t? If men cry they are not macho anymore? No no no!

I have a strong desire to cry because crying makes me strong.

To read more, click here ^_^

Just say "I don't know" will ya?

2011-05-27T09:31:00.001+08:00

Just say “I don’t know” will ya?

I see my path, but I don’t know where it leads…..
Picture by Bônita²- Miss Nonalita of flickr.com

Once upon a time there was a guy who traveled thousands of miles from Morocco to Madinah. This hell of a journey was only to accomplish one mission that is to meet Imam Malik and to ask and discuss some questions

These unanswered questions were imposed by the people of Morocco to the great, well known, renowned Imam al-Madinah that is Imam Malik. That guy was just a representative whose journey to Madinah was weeks and months

As he reached Madinah, the first station he went was to attend a program conducted by Imam Malik. In the gathering, that guy asked the unanswered questions to Imam Malik in front of many others. But sadly Imam Malik replied back “I don’t know. That problem has never risen so far in our place. Our elders have never taught us about that. Please go home tomorrow.”

The next day, before he went off to Morocco, that guy came back to Imam Malik with his donkey that was his medium of transportation. He asked again Imam Malik: “O Imam, how’s my question last night?”

Imam Malik answered: “I still do not know the answer.”

That guy did not want to go back empty handed, he insists: “O Abu Abdillah, these are issues raised by my people in Morocco. They say that there’s no person wiser and more intelligent in the world than Imam Malik. What am I suppose to report to them after this?”

Once again Imam Malik answers: “When you have returned to your hometown, tell them that Imam Malik do not know”

For more of this post, please visit Langit Ilahi ^_^

Best in the world

2011-05-20T11:15:00.000+08:00

“Find the key…” Picture by by ~endrju100

Everyone has a story to tell, so do I. My story is about persons who took my hand and showed me the path, right and left, when I was confused in a life full of mazes. They are not my Xifu, not my Sensei but they are my Murabbi(s). ß plural of Murabbi , converted to English (my English \^_^/ )

Murabbi… yeah…

From the day I learnt this word till the moment I’m breathing, as far as I know, it seems that no other word in any other language can give the same powerful meaning as the word Murabbi. If you don’t believe me then, go make a little research.

Well, the word Murabbi can be translated as the word ‘Teacher’ or ‘Guru’. And from the word teacher comes the day when we celebrate “Teacher’s day” or “Hari Guru” that is on 16^th of May every year. You know, if I have the power (“If ade power la, soon…” – in Manglish), I’ll change this celebration into “Murabbi Day” or “Hari Murabbi” and I do not care if people will say it language pollution.

For more of this post, please visit Langit Ilahi ^_^

I don't know, I just don't know

2011-05-16T13:42:00.002+08:00

"Death is a beautiful Sunset"
picture by Unitopia

One death after another,

makes me shiver.

When it is my last breath,
will I be ready for my death?

Before Allah, will everything go cool?
Or will I become a fool?

I don't know,
I just don't know.

*One death again after Ustaz Dahlan, Ummi Halimaton, Sir Yahya & Sir Ghazali, My former teacher, Ustaz Yasamsuri passed away at 4.20am this morning. He used to teach me Usul Fiqh. He is a great teacher. Even his salary is paid by University of Madinah. Other people are celebrating teachers day with joy, but I, with full of tears. His DEATH is for us to remember this day.

Leaving our LOVE behind....

2011-05-14T10:15:00.000+08:00

“I love y..” Picture by ~Alephunky of flickr.com

When two hearts are in love, being apart is hell for them. They just want to be together forever and never be apart from each other. Every moment is valuable. If it is possible, they want to live in a place where there’s no timeline whatsoever. They just want to freeze time and be together. If they have wings, they want to fly together to the skies.

This is the same with us and our sins. We surely LOVE doing our SINS. We are in love with our sins. At first, we will feel some guilt in our hearts but as time flies, when it is at its peak, we will feel nothing at all, no guilt at all. We are drowned in the sea of sins until we are able to ‘breath’ in it. We are able to bear with it until we feel uncomfortable, unease a day without it.

Before I go on, I want you to imagine you doing your sins this very moment. Imagine, remember back, and feel that temptation of you doing your sins, how does it feel? Good right? And now when you are enjoying your sins, someone pours oil onto your body and lit up the fire. Your body is on FIRE! Your body is burning like hell! You are witnessing your hand burning with fire. The pains of fire eating up your skin slowly until your hands are left with only bones. It hurts right?This is only the heat that exists on earth, what about the wrath of Al-Mighty Allah in Hell then?

So now, at this very moment your reading this, I want to dare you, let us our LOVE behind!

For more of this post, pleas visit Langit Ilahi ^_^

I am waiting for you...

2011-05-12T15:35:00.000+08:00

"I'm waiting for you"
Picture by LittlePrince83 of flickr.com

I waited for that person to come…I waited for that person to knock my door…I waited and waited endlessly…

Countless hours passed but still no sign…
No one came, no footsteps were heard…
Quiet and silent…

“When will that time come? When will that person come?” I asked myself…
I'm still waiting...for you...

I don’t want your smile to fade away!

2011-05-08T19:46:00.000+08:00

The Way We Were
Picture by *mebilia

Dear my lovely mama,

Mama, I have so many things to share, so many things to say, so many things to ask. We always discuss until mid night, sometimes even until morning! Back then, we laughed together, discussed together and exchanged ideas together. Because we are what people call an “Outspoken” family, our voices are like shouting when we are actually talking. Like the olden days yeah. I miss that moment mama, really miss it.

But I know I can’t do that now. That is why I wrote this letter. I didn’t put any address as you can see…. because this is a letter from my heart, notes of my heart. No need for address. I believe whenever it is from my heart, Allah will open the doors for you to read this letter ^_^

Mama, do you still remember the argument we had a few years back? The argument on Surah al-Isra’ verse 23 – 24. Allah says in the verse:

“Your Lord has ordained that you shall worship none but Him, and that you must be kind to your parents. Should one of them, or both, attain to old age in your care, never say ‘Ugh’ to them or chide them, but always speak gently and kindly to them,” (23)

“and spread over them humbly the wings of your tenderness, and say, ‘My Lord, bestow on them Your grace, even as they reared and nurtured me when I was a child.’ “(24)

I was against your idea, remember? Now I feel bad about it. My argument was, it was not based on scholarly reliable sources, it was from my mind and feelings which is null and void. I said that this verse was only applicable when nothing bad happens. Whenever parents have committed wrong, children can “do what it takes” to straighten a crocked iron bar. I know that an iron bar is very hard to bend and the possibility for it to break is very high. I was wrong at that time and I didn’t even gave you chance to reply back. Yeah. I was a bad boy at that time. Now I admit that I’m wrong. I’m wrong mama! I am wrong! Sorry!

Well now, after I’ve done some research by checking it on Fi Zila Lil Quran (In the Shade of the Quran) by The Martyr Sayyib Qutb and applying some of my knowledge in Arabic language. Sorry if I sound a bit academic, well after all we are in the same bachelor degree programme, so you know what I know and l learnt what you’ve learnt hehe ^^

It was my fault, my own ignorance. So now comes the real message of these verses that I couldn’t share that day.

Ok. For the first verse that is verse number 23, it can be divided into two parts.

The first, Allah starts off by saying “Your Lord has ordained that you shall worship none but Him”. Allah used the word “قَضَى” which means “ordained.” We are ordained to devote ourselves to Allah and no one else.[1]

The second part is, immediately after Allah ordains us to enslave ourselves to Him alone, He asks us to be good to our parents. Allah uses to word “إِحْسَـناً” is actually an exhortation[2] which if converted to verbal words; it should sound like this “you’d BETTER BE the best you could possibly be to your parents!”

If we screen through this verse, we will see as if one half is about Allah and the second half is about parents. But if we magnify into microscopic details, we will see that most of this verse is about parents.

On parents, first Allah says “you’d BETTER BE the best you could possibly be to your parents!”, second He says “one of them, or both, attain to old age in your care, never say ‘Ugh’ to them or chide them” third “but always speak gently and kindly to them.” Allah used the word “أفٍّ”; to my knowledge in Arabic the letter “فّ” is the softest and most tender letter of all! This means that we cannot even use “أُف”; which is the softest utterances to address them but use the gentlest speech to them! (Masya allah! I’ve messed up mama :( )

Three important things on parents, one after another but only one detail on Allah; this shows the gratitude of Allah on parents.

That is the end of verse 23. Going on to verse 24, Allah began by saying “and spread over them humbly the wings of your tenderness.” Allah used the word “جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ” which means “the wings of your tenderness”. We know we do not have wings but this is a form of imagery in the Quran. Wings here mean our “Ego”, we have wings and we are capable to inflict pain to our mother but we descend anyway. We let our “Ego” go away and position ourselves down on the ground. The only reason for us to lower our wings of ego is only because “مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ” or “Out of mercy”. “Out of mercy” here means three things at least, (1) our parent’s need our mercy, (2) they gave us mercy when we were small (3) If we want Allah to show us mercy then we ought to show mercy to our parents especially to mama!

You know mama, when I obtained this understanding, my heart went pumping hard. I feel so guilty, I feel so terrible after treating you so bad all these years. I feel like I will not enter Jannah because mama, I am afraid you haven’t forgiven my life! Seriously I feel bad.

Remember when I was 8, I had an argument with big brother, I was so pissed off that time, brother teased me until I was crying in anger. You came to me to calm me, you came to say that “Everything’s ok” but what I gave in return? I punched your chest out of anger! I was so confused; who is my kin and who is my enemy? I saw your face the moment I punched you, I know that the physical pain of an eight year old boy punching an adult strong women, but your facial expression at that time was like; your heart is burned to feel your own son punching you. The pain in your heart was unbearable. I was a kid but I was so ignorant! I want to say I’m sorry for that, but I do not know if you will forgive me….

I’m sorry again for the incident when you cooked us bean porridge. But all of your children said “yakss” because they were dead beetles in it. But even though we rejected your cook, you took out all the beetles and finish the porridge by yourself. What I was thinking? I was in no position to do that to you. I should have helped you finish the porridge. I’m sorry again mama!

Every morning after Subuh prayer, you will warn me not to sleep after Subuh. But I denied what you asked me to do. I ignored and just went to sleep. But you didn’t stop to advise me with gentle words.

But I retorted! Mama, now I’m learning not to sleep! I’m sorry for sleeping after Subuh prayer!

I don’t know mama what to say, what to write. I’ve done so many bad things; I haven’t become a good boy. I’ve used phrases like “Shut up!”, “Shut your gum up!”. I’ve called you “An old hag”, I’ve used countless curse words. But you never cease to provide me money for my education, hear my problems even when you have your own and you never even forget to smile whenever you talk.

You never stop to give me motivation. I can still remember your saying “The secrets of success in inspiration, aspiration and perspiration.”

I can still remember your smile. I still remember, you’re saying “Whenever you smile, I’ll smile”. Even though I didn’t smile, you kept on smiling. Your smile has suppressed my anger, your smile has made me stronger, and your smile has made taught me to smile forever. You are a tough woman indeed.

Mama, I have a poem for you, please read with your heart ^_^:

I don’t want your smile to fade away!

I can still remember that smile,
“Whenever you smile, I’ll smile”

you said to me with a smile.

Even if I didn’t smile, you kept on smiling,
even if I detest you, you kept on smiling,
even if I mock you, you kept on smiling.

“Are you crazy?” My heart says,
“Are you not human?” My question for days,
after seeing my mother’s smile, “Well, I am amazed.”

Your smile has suppressed my anger,
your smile has made me stronger,
your smile has made taught me to smile forever.

Seeing her smile, I feel inspired,
smelling her cook, I feel delighted,
hearing her laugh, I feel moved.

But….When she left this world, I cried…

I cried my heart out,
I cried so loud,
I cried until my tears dried out.

Now… I’m crying without tears…

Because tears are nothing,
tears cannot change anything,
But I can change everything!

Now is not the time for me to cry,
but it is the moment for me to fly!
To fly up to the sky!

With her smile as a motivation!
I will grasp my vision!
I will complete my mission!

I will not make your smile fade away!
‘Coz your smile remains in my heart forever!

Mama, until this day, I’ve been homesick since the day you left this world. But I’ve never regard you as “My late mother”. You are still my mother and nothing can change that even death. That’s why I will never call you “My late mother”, but only “My mother”. I don’t care what other may say. You still live within me. Your motivation still remains making me strong.

Mama, I regret for not being the best to you. I regret for not using the best words. I regret for not treating you gently.

Mama, I want to promise to you that I will advise others to be the best to their mothers and don’t wait till she is gone to feel guilty. I want them to feel guilty now! I want them to be the best to their mothers! This is my promise mama.

Mama, I’ve never forget to pray to Allah to place you in the highest position in Jannah. I have never forgotten this dua’ each and every time after solah:

‘My Lord, bestow on them Your grace, even as they reared and nurtured me when I was a child.’

I know, I will never repay you, nurturing me until I became a human. I was so hopeless but you gave your hand to help me stand. But this is the least I could do to repay you through my Dua’ and using the knowledge you’ve taught me.

Mama, you know, I’m crying now. I haven’t cried for so long. Thanks mama for making me cry. My hardened heart has softened now.

I don’t know what to say more mama. You know, if I am given the chance to freeze time, I want that moment to be a moment with you, mama. You and no one else!

I love you so very much!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

From your second son,

‘Abdul Muhaimin Bin Misran.

Second year,

Bachelor of English Language and Literature (BENL)

International Islamic University Malaysia

[1] In the Shade of the Quran, Sayyib Qutb, pg: 125

[2] 1. the act or process of exhorting, 2. a speech or written passage intended to persuade, inspire, or encourage

They need us or we need them?

2011-04-29T15:12:00.002+08:00

“I need you…”
Picture by WindyButNotCloudy♥ of flickr.com

“Free free Palestine! Free free Palestine” shouts Lowkey, a British rapper in his rap song titled

“Long lives Palestine”. Lowkey is one of my favorite rappers and “Long live Palestine” is one of the best rap songs I’ve ever heard.

“Long live Gaza” came out from my mouth followed the rap beat.

As I sunk deeply in the song, suddenly my shoulder was touched by some soft hands. I turned right, I saw the mouth of Siddiqi saying something but I couldn’t hear. I took off the earphone that was tucked tight in my ears.

“What are you listening?” He asked.

“Long live Palestine” I answered.

“Lowkey?” He said while his left eyebrows were raised.

“Yeah, you hear rap as well?” I asked surprised.

“Yup, but I’m not fanatic. Muslim rap, don’t get me wrong. I listen to their songs because of their lyrics not because their beat. Their lyrics usually are beautiful. You know what is RAP? ” He said while making a left turn.

“Rap is rap, rapping. Yeah!” I said while acting like a rapper on stage.

“No. RAP is Rhythm and Poetry. That is why the lyrics are touching. The Muslim rappers, the non-muslim rappers I don’t know. Don’t ask me” He smiled.

“Oh it’s ok. Let’s change topics shall we? I have a question regarding the issue on Palestine. I’ve been thinking on it lately. People are so determined in sending aids to Palestine. They spend like thousands only on Palestine. They even put their lives on the lines only to free Palestine. I really don’t understand these people – “ Siddiqi cut me in “And the question is?”

“Ah the question, almost forgot. The question is, we’ve tried so hard all this time to help them, do Palestinians really need us?”

“They don’t need us or we need them. We need them.” He answered.

“We need them? What do you mean?”

“We literally need them…”

*********************************

“You guys are always talking on Palestine, what about us Indians? I do not agree with the Palestine issue! We are suffering too!” A guy from India said to me.

I was silent for a moment. What he said is true, our brothers and sisters in India are suffering too. But how can I answer the issue he raised then?

“Brother… Let us calm down shall we. We may not be brothers by blood, but we are brothers by faith right?” I tried to carve a smile. His tight face loosens up a little bit, signs of ease are shown. The Musolla of Mahallah As-Siddiq became the proof of our “discussion” tonight.

“Yes. You are right, Allah has asked us to help every Muslims in need right?” I went slowly.

“But can I say one thing. It is not that we ignore other Muslims, but by the time being, we Malaysians are only fit to help the Palestinians now. I admit that we still don’t have the energy and money to help others. Insha Allah in the future we will help India.” Still maintaining my voice pitch.

“The Palestinians do not need us, but we need the Palestine. Freeing Al-Quds is our priority now. Remember the khutbah last week by Dr. Belghit Muhammad? He said, ‘I may am an Algerian and Palestine is not my land of blood. But Palestine is my land of faith, Al-Quds is my first Qiblah. Al-Quds is ours and ours alone’ “ I was half shouting.

“But….” – he wanted to object but I cut in first “Please let me finish my words.”

“If Dr. Belghit Muhammad says that; then I will say ‘I may be a Malaysian and Palestine is not my land of birth. By nationality, I do not have the right to claim Palestine my land, but in the name faith and humanity, I hereby claim Palestine my land and I will free my land!’” I was shouting, I just ignored all the people in the Musolla.

“The prophet has said:

Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, “Do not set out on a journey except for three Mosques i.e. Al-Masjid-AI-Haram, the Mosque of Allah’s Apostle , and the Mosque of Al-Aqsa, (Mosque of Jerusalem).”[1]

What will we tell our young ones when they ask us, which one is Mosque of Al-Aqsa? But all we can see is that Mosque of Al-Aqsa is fulfilled with non-muslims?”

“Mosque of Aqsa is the proof of our faith. If it is free then our faith is strong, but if it remains under the possession of Israel, then that means our faith is weak. We are weak. The Muslim Ummah is weak. You want that to happen, brother?” I went on; leaving him speechless.

“Sorry if I sound I bit racist, you question the efforts of my race just now right? I want to clarify. That is why we Malaysians are dying to help Palestine. We also want others to understand why we are doing this ‘job’ and participate with us. I know, not all people can go there to Palestine but we have to do what we can to help. The prophet once said:

Maymunah bint Sa’d relates that she asked the prophet, “O prophet! Inform to us about Bayt al-Maqdis (Jerusalem)“. He said, “Visit it for prayer.” She further asked, “If one of us cannot visit it, what should we do?” He said, “If you cannot go there for prayer then send some oil to be used in its lamps; whosoever gives oil for it lamps, it will be as if he has prayed in it.”[2]

“You should understand brother. Not only Indians are suffering, even Malaysians are suffering here and there. But if you say that I am racist, then you are wrong. That is all I want to say” My speech has ended.

“Thank you brother. Thank you for enlightening me. I was just ignorant about the Palestine issue but now, I’ve learnt knew things tonight. This is also my issue.” That brother said to me with utmost sincerity.

We hugged. Yeah, I love it when after a two people argues, it will end peacefully. No hard feelings. No offence.

“I love you brother. We are brothers of the land of Palestine… We need Palestine as a ticket to enter Jannah!” I said to him.

*********************************

“Masha allah, thank you for telling me the story of you and the Indian guy. When did it happen?” I asked.

“Oh, last year. After isya’ prayer. I was talking about Palestine with another Malay guy then he just barged in.” He told me.

“Thank you akhi Sidiq. Thank you for making me realize. Before this I was also just ignorant. Even on rap songs, I hear rap because the beat is good.” I said to Akhi Siddiqi.

“Who said we could rest? We will never rest until the holy land is freed.” Akhi Siddiqi added.

“Whatever religion we are in, whatever our skin color is, make sure that we do what we can to help. The least that we can do is donating our money. Let us fill up that donation box with our money.” He said while handing over a donation box cylinder in shape to me.

I was a bit reluctant at first, and then he said with a smile “The money in our pockets is not ours, but the money we donate is ours”. Well I was moved alright.

Took out RM10 note and put it in the box.

“Every cent counts, May the blessings of Allah be upon you bro.”

If we do not help then we are in the state loss! PALESTINE DOESN’T NEED US, WE NEED PALESTINE! Palestine will always prevail without our help!

[1] Bukhari :: Book 2 :: Volume 21 :: Hadith 281

[2] Imam Ahmad, Ibn Majah, Sunan Abu Dawud, and al-Tabarani

A moment for me to ponder… A moment for you to remember…

2011-04-26T17:27:00.007+08:00

"From me to you"

picture by Suhaib Alrumy, EOS 500d Canon

Just finished the program of

HIJRAH MENARA GADING (HiMEGA 11)

International Islamic University Malaysia,

KAED Main Auditorium,

22 - 24 April 2011.

A poem dedicated for you guys,

I give you;

"A moment for me to ponder… A moment for you to remember…"

Dear my lil bro’s and sis’s of HiMEGA 2011,

It is a pleasure for us to have you guys as our guests of honor.
You guys are a special gift for us, very very special indeed.
It has been a long time since… I have been waiting; we have been waiting will all our heart…

But now the time is with us. Three days of togetherness is our start…
From this day onwards, we will be one till we are apart…
This is it the moment for us to care… This is the moment for us to share…
This is the moment for us to hug and kiss… This is the moment for us to love and exchange gifts…

Dear my lil bro’s and sis’s of HiMEGA 2011,

Bringing Islam back to this world is our vision…
so being an ‘Alim Mujahid is our mission…

Let us stand strong shall we?
Who says the dump cannot see?

Who claims the deaf cannot hear?

Let us stand up! Stand strong! And stand tall!
Let us stand even though standing is hard…

There is not a moment to lose…
Victory is what we must choose…
We are the cure of our sick ones…
We are the strength of our weak ones…

Dear my lil bro’s and sis’s of HiMEGA 2011,

You know, if I am given the chance to freeze time,
I want that moment to be our special moment together…
A moment for me to ponder… A moment for you to remember…

Click to enlarge (Copy la kalau nak ^_^)

“FIFA VS FIFA”

2011-04-23T19:57:00.002+08:00

“I am not free”
picture by Pink Sherbet Photography of flickr.com

English Coloumn of Langit Ilahi

Date: 22/4/2011

By: Ameen Misran

There is an International Seminar on Peace and Humanitarian Aid for Gaza,

Tomorrow (23/4/2011) at Conference Room, Cultural and Activity Center (CAC), IIUM,

From 8.30 am to 5.00 pm,

A program organized by Haluan Palestine, Yayasan Belia Malaysia (YBM) and Journalism Club IIUM.

I’ll be the MC for this one day program. Huh.

Need to charge up my spirit of Bring that Peace, Break the Siege!

So this is from me!

“FIFA VS FIFA”

^_^

“Tit tit… Tit tit” The ring tone on Amir’s HTC HD Mini sounded. He unlocked the screen.

Bro! Tonight is the night man! Your team and my team are up. Real Madrid vs. Barcelona. Come let’s hang out and see who will win. Like old times man! You and I…

Sender:
Abdul Qawy

0193900000

Amir leaned back on the seat of his 12 year old Kancil Produa after reading the message.

Do I have to go? I really love soccer. I love to watch my favorite players in action. I love Real

Madrid!

But….

I already have a family not like the old times. I have my priorities.

But….

They are my childhood friends. I usually hang out with them.

Arghh! I do not know what to say!

“Tit tit… Tit tit” another message came into my inbox.

Still waiting for your reply man. Restoran Saffiyah, Taman Universiti. In one hour. Make up your mind and reply bro.

Sender:
Abdul Qawy
0193900000

What do I have to reply?

*************************************************

OUT OF EAGERNESS, a little child came running down the stairs rushing towards his father “Papa, what does FIFA stand for?” asked that child wanting an immediate answer from his father.

Amir who was watching the live match between Germany vs. England on Astro ESPN was bothered by the trivial question from his second born. He did not want any uproar, not when England is in action! So he just ignored his son as if he never heard a thing and placed his eyes on the plasma flat screen TV.

“Dad, are you there?” asked Amar while massaging his father’s back. Amir shakes his body as a silent sign of “do not disturb me, I’m busy”, but what more can Amir expect from his 8 year old son to understand body language? So Amar goes off from massaging to tickling his father right in the armpit.

“Ok ok, all right already, I lose, you win, what was your question again?” Amir admits defeat. He slowed down the screaming volume coming from the TV; the house living room seemed quite after that.

“What does FIFA stand for?” Amar repeated his question.

“FIFA is the abbreviation for The Fédération Internationale de Football Association in French or in English the International Federation of Football Association, happy now?” said Amir while increasing again the TV volume. It was 2:0 now, Germany 2, England 0. “England, do something quick!” Cried Amir wanting his favorite team shine!

“Dad?! Are you ok?” Amar was puzzled after seeing his father screaming ‘Go England Go’ and gripping tight his fist while punching the air.

At the 37^’minute of the game, Steven Gerrard gave a cross; the ball flew right into where Mathew Upson wants it. But before Mathew could do anything, the Plasma flat screen TV blacked out. Nothing was there, no Stadium, no field, no ball and no goal.

What happened? There’s no black out, the lights were still on. Everything was quite. “Where is the remote?”His inner voice screamed out of anger! Amir was still focusing on the black screen then suddenly what appeared in front of him was his son’s face, not what he hoped for.

“Dad, I called you like ten times already but you didn’t hear me out” Amar said while holding

the black remote controller in his hands.

“Why you little…” Amir’s face was red all over; his rage grew intense by the moment, any minute now he can burst out. But after seeing his son’s cute little face, the face full of inquiry. He calmed down. Took a deep breath and said “What is it this time?”

“Dad, mama said that FIFA stands for FIGHT ISRAEL FREE AQSA, F=Fight, I=Israel, F=Free and A=Aqsa. Isn’t it right papa?” Amar told his father while spelling with his fingers.

“Papa…papa…daddy…are you there?” now Amar is puzzled for the second time after seeing his father stiff like a rock.

Amir sank in his own thoughts. The voice of his son faded away slowly. FIGHT ISRAEL FREE AQSA?! Free AQSA?!

He then flashed back on how his enthusiasm to help our brothers and sisters in GAZA, he drove his family from Johor to Melawati Stadium Shah Alam just to join a concert, not any ordinary concert but the Palestine Mass Gathering, Concert Life Line 4 GAZA on 13 Mei 2010, about a month and a half ago. He donated about RM1 thousand to the LL4G project.

On 31 May 2010, during the raid of Israeli Commandos on Mavi Marmara, he was one of the busiest persons writing articles and forwarding text messages condemning the brutal act of Israel towards this humanitarian aid.

On 4^th June 2010, he pleaded a day off from his employer for the sake of taking part in the demonstration in front of the US Embassy.

But starting on 11June 2010, the drive of “Let Us free Aqsa” and “Let Us Unite for Palestine” gradually diminished from him. What happened on June 11^th 2010? This is the day where the title “The most prestige’s sport” came into action. It was the starting of the World Cup 2010 South Africa.

“Astaghfirullah…”

Freeing Al-Aqsa was my dream! Breaking the siege on Gaza was my mission! But what I have done?

How can I say that I am aware about Palestine when I have my time with the fake meaning of FIFA. How come?

How come I say I love my brothers and sisters in Palestine when I have feeling enjoinment and tranquility while my brothers and sisters strife’s to live?

I am busy with all the bills I have to pay, but they, they are busy whether or not they can survive another day?

What brotherhood am I portraying? Ukhuwah Islamiyah? NO. I am a disgrace to the Muslims.

How can I claim that Al-Aqsa is Muslims and Muslims alone but in the same time I feel enjoyment in the ‘fun’ created by the enemies of Islam?

What am I? Am I really a Muslim? Or a Muslim only by name?

If I am a Muslim, why do I remember the names of football players more than the name of Muslim scholars?

If I am a Muslim, why can I spend countless hours in front of the television watching a soccer match, but when it comes to Qiamullail, even two rakaah is hard for me!

Why is this happening to me? Why can’t I see clearly?

The black box in front of me is a ‘stupid box’ once said by Syed Qutb, but I watch that stupid box all day. I am also stupid then.

“Astaghfirullah… Astaghfirullah…”

I’m crying now. I always fulfill my life with sins, always transgressing bounds with defiant grins.

“Astaghfirullah… Astaghfirullah…”

“Amar… Come here” Amir called for his son.

Amir hugged his son. Tight. He looked at his son. “I love you son” tiny droplets of tears

came running through his cheeks.

“Thanks for making me realize.” He added.

Amar was a bit confused of what was going on. A minute there his father was full of energy, but after the Plasma TV is off, now he is crying. He doesn’t get it.

“Son, from this day onwards, I will become a new person!”

“I will never let Shaytan control me. I will never let other ideologies take over me.”

“I will uphold FIGHT ISRAEL, FREE AQSA!”

“This is my promise. You are my witness my son.”

*************************************************

Sorry bro. I have no time to waste time even a special match between Real Madrid and Barcelona. FIGHT ISRAEL, FREE AQSA. That is part of their plan to make us Muslims forget our vision and mission. Sorry, can’t join ya

Sender:
Amir
0137373733

Yes. I have made a promise to my son not to let Shaytan take control over me in all causes!

This is the proof trustworthiness! I keep my word!

And I hope you will not follow my bad side. Just follow my good side.

Please.

I beg you.

Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration

2011-04-21T15:01:00.001+08:00

"What's on your mind? Success?"

picture by tic.tac.toc of flickr.com

Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration

By: Ameen Misran

“The secrets of success are Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration” says my mother to me. I felt a little bit awkward because in the middle of nothing, she voiced out this phrase. “Strange”, but I’m not going to express my feelings because something else might happen if I do so. I might break her heart.

My mother seemed very determined and serious when she conveyed her message just, her face and hand gesture are like she is giving a talk to a mass of people. Wow!

But because of my blurriness and my facial expression changed from feeling “strange” to “confusion”; her face also changed.

“Do you understand what I said just now?” she asked seeing me in the state of confusion.

“Hmm… I didn’t really get it mama” I said while scratching my head and carving a smile.

“What comes to your mind when I say Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration” she asked me again, determined to make me understand. She is my mother alright. She will do what it takes to enlighten me with new knowledge. That’s what mothers do right?

“Hehe… You know, all of a sudden, images of my Phonetics classes flashes to my mind” I explained, half laughing.

“Ei? What do you mean?” Now my mother is confused. LOL.

“Yeah… Inspiration I definitely know. But for aspiration, according to Phonetics, the meaning of aspiration, that is a scientific term, the release of a strong burst of air after some obstruent’s making it the process of speech production. And perspiration is kinda like sweating. So how come it is related to success?” I argued in brief. I know my mother understands what I said because she is also an English major like I am. She even has a PHD in English. If a non-English major hears this, one will definitely feel like “Huh! What is this?”. My mother only smiled seeing her son in the state of confusion.

“Not that one my son!” She said while placing her hand on both of my shoulders. WOW! My mother really loves me! Her eyes are burning with determination.

“So please enlighten me mama!” Now I feel motivated and moved to understand what she is trying to tell me. Now it was my turn to place my hands on both of mama’s shoulder. I am way higher than my mother, so I have to bend a little bit down. This scene is like two people in love holding shoulders and full of love in eye to eye contact. Beautiful. Don’t get it wrong, my mother and me are in love! A love from a mother to her son and vice versa!

“Ok lemme get this straight,” my mother started lecturing; my eyes are focusing on her mouth now.

“I will give the explanation of Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration one by one respectively and you will understand how it is related to success. Here I go” she has finished her introduction. My mother asked me to sit down on the chair while she explains like a true professional.

“What is inspiration?” She attracts my attention with a question. “Inspiration is a motivating and mesmerizing influence. A feeling that makes you moved. You are going to be inspired by looking at people around you. You will be jealous at the same time motivated by reading on the most successful people’s achievement. You will feel like mapping their achievement into yours. You will see that these people can do the impossible and can change all the so called ‘Impossible’ things to become things as easy as ABC.” A long detailed info is explained.

“Wow” I said.

“You’re amazed already? We haven’t come to the climax yet. This means that you are already inspired by me. Hehe” my mother said. She is a true motivator. I am moved.

“Ok. Aspiration. We are not talking on either ASPIRE by Acer or aspiration like you said earlier. But what we understand here is that aspiration is a strong desire, aim and longing. Aspiration is an extension of inspiration. When you are inspired, you will be aspired, meaning that a strong drive will exist in your soul. You will set a goal in your life. Let’s say, one day you wanna be the best singer or poet in the world, even beating Maher Zain! That is aspiration.” Another thorough explanation from my mother. She even mentioned Maher Zain; my favorite singer of all times! Maybe because she always sees me singing Maher Zain’s songs; that’s why she took it as an example.

“And the last showdown my son! Perspiration. Perspiration literally means sweating, you were right but you are lack of something. What is it?” My mother asked.

“Dunno, you tell me love” I said.

“You are lack of analogy. You are always too scientific. Loosen up a little bit! Explore the world of literature through the world of analogy! The analogy of perspiration or in others words, sweating is effort. Let’s say you wanna be the number one runner in a cross-country. The distance is 5KM, what will you have to do to make sure you are fit? What will you have to do to make sure you maintain and improve your stamina? You need to run. You need a hell lot of training. And through the process of training, you will sweat profusely. This is the same in studying or achieving something. If you do not ‘sweat’, then you will not succeed.” Detail, detail indeed.

“Does that mean I have to sweat and bring extra clothes everywhere I go?” I asked, I actually already understand my mother’s explanation, but just to see how she reacts.

“No! You don’t need to literally sweat, but you need to be wholeheartedly in doing your job. You mustn’t take everything for granted.” Love my mother’s determination, full of gestures and the voice intonation is smooth. I smiled looking at my mother’s reaction. Heee….

“Why are you smiling? Something wrong?”

“No, no, not at all mother”

“What I’ve explained before you are not just merely words, but it is a concept you must apply in your daily lives. I’ll give you an example. If you wanna be a great person in both academic and Deen, you need to become an ‘Alim Mujahid. Ever heard the word ‘Alim Mujahid before?

“Alim is knowledgeable… Mujahid is…erm… Terrorist?” I said.

“Hah! No, No. You got it all wrong.”

“A Mujahid is not a terrorist. Do not follow the conventional definition you hear on the news. Ok. ‘Alim’ means Knowledgeable. ‘Mujahid’ means someone who is active and fights for Islam. Fight here does not limit it to wars, but it gives the connotation of doing the best as you are fighting for something. So ‘Alim Mujahid means a knowledgeable person who fights for Islam. In some other terms, you can use, PRO-TAZ which means Professional Ustaz.”

“So how can you become an ‘Alim Mujahid, Ameen?” My mother asks me.

But she answered her question. “You need to find your source of inspiration to make sure your motivation remains ‘strong’. You can contemplate the stories of the great Islamic achievemnents in history and even present. Then you must set your goal, that is your aspiration, what do you have to accomplish in a period of time. And lastly, you need to put your inspiration and aspiration into action. If it is left in your head, then it is just left as a dream, a dream that will not come true.”

I nodded my head, now I really understand what success is.

My mother continued “One more thing son-” she stopped half a second, her toned has changed to a little bit slower than before “when people put an effort, what they are dying to wait is to see the results. This is not what I understand. How the results are gonna be is Allah’s doings. We plan doing something, but Allah’s plan will always prevail. That is why we put an effort on something not for the sake of results, but for the sake of Allah alone. What may be the outcome, good or bad, it is Allah’s doings. Our part, we need to try to cope and adapt what Allah has given us.”

Masha Allah! I learnt so many things today. “Thanks mom!” I said.

“Here’s a little souvenir for you, son” she handed over to me a sheet of paper. A clean sheet of paper.

“What this for?” I asked. I thought that I would receive a payment check or something else more valuable.

“Get your pen and write I’m gonna say.”

“Huh…” I sighed.

“It’s for your own good son”

“Ok…”

“There are five qualities of an ‘Alim Mujahid, there are –“ before my mother could finish, I cut in “Wait! Don’t go too fast.”

“The first is, an ‘Alim Mujahid has a sound ‘Aqidah (Muslim belief system).” My mother paused for a second or two. I managed to scribble her words slowly.

“The second is an ‘Alim Mujahid has a clear understanding on Islam.”

“The third is that an ‘Alim Mujahid must be excellent in their academic performance. DL is a must for you Ameen.” Says my mum.

“What’s DL?” I asked, never heard of the term.

“Dean List. DL.”

“Dean list!? That’s impossible….”

“Nothing is impossible, Impossible is nothing” My mother said with a smile.

“The fourth is an ‘Alim Mujahid must be active in spreading Islam. In other words active in Da’wah”

“And the final quality is an ‘Alim Mujahid must use their career as a medium to spread Da’wah. That is all. Don’t write that is all” My mother finished her ‘speech’.

She added “You still remember the concept of Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration? Apply it in becoming an ‘Alim Mujahid. And it is not necessary to take Deen courses if you wanna be an ‘Alim Mujahid. You can take whatever you want but still you can become an ‘Alim Mujahid.”

“Huhu… Whatever you may say mom, it is still hard”

“No pain no gain then. If I can obtain a PHD, why can’t you my son? Right?”

“But…”

“But what? You know, who says the deaf cannot hear? Who says the dump cannot see? They can hear, they can see to an extent, way better than us. Who says that there is no life for disabled? Even the maimed can walk and stand up. We have to stand up even when standing is hard.”

“Hmm.. Ok mum. I’ll try.”

“Yes, you have to try, and then you’ll learn. Come, go have some rest. It’s already 12 midnight.”

“Ok mama. Love you.” I blew a midnight kiss to my mother and went to my room.

*******************************

Climbed the stairs one by one. My room is on the second level of our house.

I went straight to the rest room to ease myself before going to be.

As I entered my room, I’m tired. My room was full of light. I killed off the lights. Only light from the street light coming from my room window is seen. Light was dimmed; I am in a lonely room. Crawled into my bed. Closed my eyes.

My eyes are closed but my mind is still thinking of Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration and ‘Alim Mujahid. I kept on saying that “I can’t become one, I can’t do it”.

But remembering what my mother said, “We need to stand even when standing is hard”

I made up my mind, I think can do it!

“I’ll become an ‘Alim Mujahid!”

I will one day!

Dark.

Bring that Peace, Break the siege!

2011-04-20T17:24:00.000+08:00

"Dove..."
picture by Cappy0161 of flickr.com

I don’t feel like writing long posts,
I just wanna chill.

Here’s a poem dedicated to all the Muslims,
enjoy yeah!

“Bring that Peace, Break the siege!”

We have been silent for so long,
we have been quite for all these years.

We are imprisoned in our own home,
we are trapped in our own dome.

Don’t you feel that this is the time to stand up!
Don’t you feel that this is the time to wake up!

They took our land,
they killed our brothers,
they rapped our sisters,
they put bullets in the heads of our young ones.

Yes brothers! Yes sisters!
It is time.

But first we must ask ourselves.

Are we ready to stand up!
Are we ready to fight this systematic genocide!

Let us fight, hand in hand, back to back, against this terrorism,
against these terrorists.

But how can we free the holy land?
Never keep silent before the holy land is freed.

Free Free Palestine, Free Free Palestine

Bring that Peace, Break the Siege!

Palestine, remains in my heart,
forever….

^_^

I will never stand down!

2011-04-19T11:15:00.011+08:00

"Stand Tall" by Picture ~Dshark of deviantart.com

Asslamualaykum!

Although my exams have finished last Saturday, but I'm actually bloody busy right now with two consecutive programs that are:

1. Hijrah Menara Gading 2011 (HiMEGA 11) that is on 22 - 24 April 2011, KAED Main Auditorium, IIUM
2. International Seminar on Peace and Humanitarian Aid for Gaza 2011, on 23 April 2011, at Cultural Activity Centre, IIUM (I'll become the MC for this program... hee)

Wow! This is my first experience in an international program! Masha Allah!

So I wanted to share with you guys a short poem I wrote this morning;

Even if you knock me down,
even if you take over my crown,
even though you cut all my hands and feet,
even though you take my ability to see and speak,
I will never, ever stand down!

I'm actually trying my best not to feel down. Well I do feel spiritually weak sometimes.

Please, I really need your dua'.

May Allah love you guys!

Cheers!

Anger is power?

2011-04-09T15:01:00.002+08:00

“I killed that DOUGHNUT…”
Picture by googlit of Flickr.com

Since I was a kid, I am a cartoon-addict, well to be honest, I’m still one until now. I love to watch cartoons. Seriously. Doesn’t matter what type of cartoon, either anime or cartoon network anything you name it. Even Spongebob!

As far as I can remember, only two characters “taught” the wisdom of “Anger is power”. The two characters are Son-Gohan in Dragon Ball and Bruce from The Incredible Hulk. These two characters will become stronger and more powerful as their anger is triggered. Son-Gohan defeated Sell when he was in Super-Sayyan Jin two mode, he was the first to ever reach that stage at that time, not even Son-Goku. On the other hand, for Hulk, Ironman once said to him “When you get angry Bruce, when you are overcome by rage, you are a force of destruction. You fear nothing and even the mightiest heroes of Earth cannot deter you. The madder you get the stronger you get and there is no limit to your rage…” (Ironman, Planet Hulk 2010).

Before this the wisdom I got was that “Anger is power” and I exactly “believed” of what was “Preached” in these movies. When I grew a bit older, I pondered back, is anger really a source of power?

Click here to read more ^_^

or

Here

Anger, what’s that??

I’m not gonna give an academic definition, but anger is, to my personal experience, an irrational state mind and body that can make unpredictable things to the extent, you wanna kill someone! That is anger all right.

Anger is the feeling of “I am right” and “Others are wrong”. You will go off doing what you think is right without considering the opinion of others. You will do anything to convince people that you are right. To some degree, you will use the extraordinary words you don’t usually use during this state what I call “The state of stupidity”. "Extraordinary" words as in curse words. Yikes!

Your whole facial expression will change, from white to red. You will experience your blood pressure rising and you feel hot, literally hot. You will most probably sweat. You will feel like if you had the chance, you could just tear the skin from the flesh of the person you’re mad at with. Ouch.

Your unconscious mind will take over your body and you be like “Am I doing this”, “is this me” and “what am I doing?”. Now you tell me, have you had this similar experience before?

You will literally forget who you are when you are in rage. Literally forget just like that. The solely goal you want to achieve is to get rid of the subject of your anger.

I’ll share you my experience just recently (Real experience). I had an argument with my sahabah I’ve known him for quite a time. But I was so pissed off, I really said to him this “If you say one more word, I’ll kill you!”. Eventually, one more word came out from his mouth, I was overwhelmed! I got up and really wanted to smash his head off. But less than a split second, I pulled back my swinging hand. I didn’t hit him. I didn’t know why. Until now I regard that as a mystery.

Devils are laughing!

Remember back how it is when you’re contempt. When you are letting yourself go and letting rage taking over your body, this is when devil will laugh like mad you know. They have managed to suppress down your Iman and trigger your anger. Anger is from Devil as the hadith goes:

Narrated Atiyyah as-Sa’di:

Abu Wa’il al-Qass said: We entered upon Urwah ibn Muhammad ibn as-Sa’di. A man spoke to him and made him angry. So he stood and performed ablution; he then returned and performed ablution, and said: My father told me on the authority of my grandfather Atiyyah who reported the Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) as saying: Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created of fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when one of you becomes angry, he should perform ablution. (Dawud :: Book 41 : Hadith 4766)

The last time I was overcome by rage, you know what my other Sahabah said to me after I got better, “Ameen, your face was really like Syaitan!” Astaghfirullah! (This is true, not made up ok). What he meant was not me growing two horns or my ears when pointy edged or my eyebrows grew thicker, no not that type of Syaitan. But my face turned red, my voice was so loud, the words I choose to say was like “You %$@*!!” (Too horrible, can't say it).

You know, if I recorded that video of me and I play it back, I will definitely feel stupid. Yeah, stupid. How can I, a Muslim, let anger control myself? How can I, a Mukmin let Devil possess my soul? This is not what the prophet showed to me. This is not what Allah asked me to do. No, no.

When you’re in “The state of stupidity”

Maybe these are the things that can help you when you’re in the “The state of stupidity”. These things can help you if you help yourself (If you know what I mean). But if you want anger possess your soul, then so be it, its your choice then. But I would advise you to take these precautious measures seriously:

1 – Seek refuge with Allah from the Devil:

Sulayman bin Sard narrated:

“I was sitting with the Prophet, when two men began slandering one another. One of them was red in the face, and the veins on his neck were standing out. The Prophet said: ”I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said: “I seek refuge with Allah from the Devil,” what he feels would go away.’”

['Fath al-Bari'; 6/337]

2 – Remain silent:

The Messenger of Allah said:

“If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent.”

['Sahih al-Jami'; # 693]

3 – Sit down or lie down:

“Abu Dharr was taking his camels to drink at a trough that he owned, when some other people came along and said to one another: “Who can compete with Abu Dharr in bringing animals to drink and make his hair stand on end?” A man said: “I can.” So, he brought his animals and competed with Abu Dharr and ended up breaking the trough.Abu Dharr was standing when he saw this, so, he sat down, then he laid down. Someone asked him: “O Abu Dharr, why did you sit down then lie down?” He said: “The Messenger of Allah said: ”If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so that his anger will go away. If iit does not go away, let him lie down.”"” [Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad (5/152) and 'Sahih al-Jami' (694)]

Al-Imam al-Khattabi said: “One who is standing is in a position to strike and destroy, while the one who is sitting is less likely to do that, and the one who is lying down can do neither. It is possible that the Prophet told the angry person to sit down or lie down so that he would not do something that he would later regret and Allah Knows best.” ['Ma'alim as-Sunan'; 5/141]

4 – Smile:

Anas bin Malik narrated:

“I was walking with the Messenger of Allah, and he was wearing a Najrani cloak with a rough collar. A bedouin came and seized him roughly by the edge of his cloak, and I saw the marks left on his neck by the collar. Then the bedouin ordered him to give him some of the wealth of Allah that he had. The Prophet turned to him and smiled, then ordered that he should be given something.” ['Fath al-Bari'; 10/375]

5 – Remember the advice of the Prophet:

Abu Hurayrah narrated:

“A man said to the Prophet: “Advise me.” He said: ”Do not become angry.” The man repeated his request several times, and each time the Prophet said to him: ”Do not become angry.”" ['Fath al-Bari'; 10/456]

According to another narration, the man later said: “I thought about what the Prophet said, and I realized that anger combines all kinds of evil.” [Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad; 5/373]

6 – Remember the high status of those who control themselves:

The Messenger of Allah said:

“The strong man is not the one who can overpower others. Rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry.”[Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad; 2/236, and it is authentic]

7 – Rewards for those who control their anger:

The Messenger of Allah said:

“Do not become angry, and Paradise is yours.” ['Sahih al-Jami'; # 7374]

8 – Remember that resisting anger is one of the signs of righteousness:

“And march forth in the way to forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as the heavens and the earth, prepared for the righteous; those who spend in prosperity and in adversity, repress anger, and pardon men. Verily, Allah loves the good-doers.” [Al 'Imran; 134]

Conclusion: Anger is disaster!

Now I’ve come to the conclusion is that Anger is disaster! I was fooled by people who act cool but actually are fools. Anger is not power. Anger only gives adverse effects and no good effects:

‘Alqamah bin Wa’il narrated:

“My father said to me: “I was sitting with the Prophet, when a man came to him leading another man by a rope. He said: “O Messenger of Allah, this man killed my brother.” The Messenger of Allah asked him, ”Did you kill him?” He said: “Yes, I killed him.” He asked:”How did you kill him?” He said: “He and I were hitting a tree to make the leaves fall for animal feed, and then he insulted me, so I struck him on the side of the head with an axe and killed him.”"
['Sahih Muslim'; # 1307]

Alhamudlillah, until now I haven’t killed anybody… Yet…

Well my last advice for you is, don’t you feel you’re are superior and powerful in rage because you’re just showing your weakness in this “State of stupidity”. The prophet once said:

Abu Huraira reported: I heard Allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: One is not strong because of one’s wrestling skillfully. They said: Allah’s Messenger, then who is strong? He said: He who controls his anger when he is in a fit of rage. (Muslim :: Book 32 : Hadith 6314)

You will not look lame if you choose to erase your anger. You will not look weak but you are a strong one.

Even if you are in anger because of justice, there is still a better way of doing things right?

The reason why I pulled back my swinging hand in a spilt-second decision was because my Iman gained back possession. Huh. Or not it’s gonna be a fight to death then!

So, anger is not power but anger is disaster!

It's not the end of the world

2011-04-02T14:50:00.005+08:00

“Even if you drown, you can still swim…”Picture by Muttaqee Misran @ Masterpiecestudios

My first short story on Langit Ilahi!

A true story of mine,

dedicated to all post-SPM students of 2010,

& for those who feel terrible in their academic achievement,

I present to you:

“It’s not the end of the world”

Enjoy yeah!

^__^

“Ameen, why do I feel so stupid?” Ask Dayang Liyana to me.

Looking at her face, I see a sad gloomy face; eyelids dropping down and losing focus in her eyes, slowly her eyes were brimming with tears.

Yeah, she is in the state of sadness. What can I do? She’s not my sister; she’s just an ordinary classmate to me. Why should I bother helping then? But then, I tried to digest her question again “why do I feel so stupid?” gradually I felt empathy. I know how it feels like to become ‘stupid’. “I must say something to sooth her heart” I said inside my head. She is my friend.

“Hmm… You’re not stupid, you just don’t know the answers” I tried to calm her.

We just had our mid-semester test results. She was upset of her marks, she got less than half. I got 11 out of 15. The subject Sciences of Hadith is actually a challenging subject. Really.

“But, it’s so hard to score…” she went on nearly cried.

Argh!! I hate it when a woman is showing her weakness in front of me. I just hate it. It makes me feel I wanna cry also. I must say something. If you want to sooth her, stay calm!

“You know sis, it’s not the end of the world. We still have time right? Let’s do this!” I carved a smile on my face.

Her face seems a bit relaxed than before. This is my time to scram! I just don’t want to make her feel that I have feelings for her. I want to minimum my communication with girls because I’m shy, I am a shy guy, yes I am.

“Erm.. Dayang, I have a class after this. I have to go…” I said in a hurry.

“Owh. Ok. Go. Bye!” She smiled and waved her hand.

As I walked to my next class that is Introduction to Psychology, I remembered back what I said just now, I said “it’s not the end of the world?”

********************

“Tit Tit… Tit tit…” The sound of my cell phone.

1 message received

Unlocked the keypad and read the message.

Ameen! Have you known your SPM results yet?

Sender:
Ammar Amran
0134748679

“Oh! I forgot! Today is the day! All the SPM candidates of 2006 will get the results. Including me! What will I get? I studied hard! I did my best! How is it gonna be?”

I was so anxious to know my results. Who is not right? My fingers dance on the keypad replying Ammar’s message.

Of course not Amar, I’m in Suria KLCC now. How can I know my results then? How’s your mate? Can you check it for me?

Delievered to:
Ammar Amran
0134748679

I’m at Suria KLCC. I went to this Arabic Language Camp in Perlis for three months starting early this year and a trip from Perlis to Kuala Lumpur was the closing program for this camp. Most of the participants were post SPM 2006 students, same age of me trying to kill time as after SPM we have like three months of holiday. I bet they are as uneasy as me right now. Suria KLCC is our final stop before we head back to Perlis again.

I was at the fourth floor of the Suria KLCC. My solely target was to go to Kinokuniya Book Store. One of my favorite book stores in Malaysia. I wanted to search for a book titled “How to read a person like a book” by Gerard Nierenberg. A friend advice me to buy it to enhance your soft skills, you can learn how to read people like you read books. Kinda related to psychology though. I love psychology, so that’s why I’ll buy it.

As I walked around Kinokuniya Book Store searching the book, I flashed back on how I prepared for SPM last year.

“Yeah I did do my best. I studied all night and day. Full of eyes bags almost every day. Two years of preparation for thirteen subjects but only for one month of answering. Studying for SPM is truly a back breaking experience!”

My cell phone vibrated, I silenced the phone because I don’t want to make a sound.

Wo dude, relax man. Okeh. Gimme time broer. I’ll give you the detailed info on yours first. Mine? You don’t wanna know bout it.

Sender:
Ammar Amran
0134748679

“I can’t wait for my results! Judging from my trial examination, I got 7A’s 5B’s and 1C. Quite ok right? Well, I know that I’m not an intelligent student but I’m in the middle. Insha Allah my SPM results will be better.” That usually happens to all my seniors, their SPM results are better than their trial results.

Your results are definitely yours. Up to you bro. But I want to know mine! Hehe ^_^

Delievered to:
Ammar Amran
0134748679

After nearly half an hour patrolling the book shop, I founded the book. There it stands on the shelf wrapped neatly in plastic. Without hesitation, I took it. I know it’s RM40 but money is nothing compared to what I’ll explore from this book.

Took the book to the counter and paid it. Done. The book “How to read a person like a book” by Gerard Nierenberg is mine now. All I’ve gotta do is read it!

Went out of Kinokuniya and crashed on to a bench near the area. Open the plastic wrapper of the book and read through the introduction. Very interesting, the language and style of writing was very simple and very friendly indeed.

Before I could proceed further swimming in this ocean of psychology, my cell phone rang, someone texted me.

Please make sure that you get back to the bus before 12.30 pm.

Sender:
Ust Mahadzir
0135041501

Ouh! I have to go back to the bus, they’ll leave me here. What time is it now? It’s already 12.00 pm. I’d better get going.

Got up and began walking, my destiny was the elevator. From Kinokuniya to the elevator, there’s an interval about 3 minutes. In that 3 minutes, another person texted me because my ringtone rang and there’s a vibration in my pocket.

This is your result man. BM-4B, BI-2A, HIST-5C, MATH-2A, BAT-7D, +MATH-5C, FIZ-4B, CHEM-6C, BIO-5C, TAS-1A, PQS-4B, PSI-4B & EST-4B. 3A, 5B, 4C & 1D. May Allah strengthen you my friend.

Sender:
Ammar Amran
0134748679

“What the…? Is this my result? No no! This is not mine! There must be some mistake. I’m not stupid as this!”

Is this my result Amar?

Delievered to:
Ammar Amran
0134748679

“I can’t believe this. This is not mine! My results should be far better than this.”

Sorry to say but this is yours, no mistake. I’m so sorry. Btw, my result is more or less like yours. huhu :(

Sender:
Ammar Amran
0134748679

“It can’t be! Arghh! My trial is far better than this. Darn it! Screw me! Screw everybody! Screw the world!”

“What is the use of my study for all these years huh? Did it paid off? Why? Why am I getting this stupid news? Why am I stupid? No. I’m not. There’s some marking mistake going on then. These guys just hate me. Envy me. That’s why they gave me bad markings. I was too excellent in my answers, these guys are just jealous of me.”

“No. This is all Allah’s doings. I can’t accept this, I will not accept this! I studied like hell but why my results are like rubbish huh? You said that if I do my best, I’ll get the best but now, is this best result for me? Tell me huh? What am I to you? Rubbish? I prayed all night and day, I did what you told me but now, what you have given me? You gave me trash! Garbage!”

I just went on cursing the Education Ministry, the teachers who marked my papers and most dreadfully, I cursed Allah.

I just broke down to tears and cried beside the elevator. I ignored the hundreds of people around me. I know they were looking at me as if I’m a bagger or something. But who cares?

My trial was far better than my SPM results. Far more better like heaven and hell. All the subjects that I got A were down to B. The most frustrating of all is that I got a D in my Arabic Language paper. I was like… Arghh… I got it A for my trials.

“Why is this happening to me? I wish I was not born”

I got up and stood up beside the fence. I stared down at the floors down there. You know what I was really feeling at that time?

“There’s no use of living! I must die”

I wanted to jump from the fifth floor and kill myself. Seriously. I climbed up the fence that was preventing me from jumping. But then half way, Anas Hakimi was around the area saw me and shouted “Ameen!”

I got back down the fence touching the floor. Many people were staring at us and begin to make some noise.

“No. My life is just rubbish now! I am already dead. Allah doesn’t love me anymore.”

I climbed back up the fence again. At that very moment, that very moment where I was hanging on the fence, I remembered one scene that took place six years ago when I was form 1.

********************

“Bro Amru, why am I so stupid?” I said to my dearest bro crying my heart out. The whole Musolla could hear my tears but there were nobody at that time. Everybody has gone to other places. After Zohor prayer, it is usually like this.

“hmm… You’re not stupid, you just don’t know how to answer” said him trying to sooth my heart.

“But, it’s so hard to score…So hard… Sob sob…”

“You know Ameen, it’s not the end of the world. We still have time right? Let’s do this!” Bro Amru smiled.

The bruise in my heart was a little bit healed, like someone bandaged the bruise.

“I know you can do this Ameen. I do.” Bro Amru finished his words and gave me a hug. Yeah I needed that.

“Thanks broer” I said in my heart while smiling.

********************

“Ameen! Ameen! You can’t do this” shouted Anas.

“Huh? Who says I can’t do this? Bro Amru said I can do this?” I said to myself. Suddenly I realized where myself was, I was hanging on the fence. People’s eyeballs were on me. They were watching from afar. I was like a superstar. Wow!

“It’s not the end of the world. It is really not the end of the world.” I said to myself.

“Thanks again. Broer… You are my love…” I said in my heart while smiling.

I got down from the fence. Swiped off my tears. Took the book where I thrown during my madness. I said to Anas while smiling “Let’s head to the bus.”

Anas and everybody was like “Huh? This guy is weird”…

Police and security guards were on their way. But the minute they were here, Anas and I were already in the elevator. Bye bye!

In the elevator, Anas said “Are you mad? You could’ve killed yourself you know”…

“Sorry for troubling you. I was just…” – Anas cut me in “…Upset right. I’m upset as you are…” He stopped a split second and continued “…the difference between you and me is that I can control myself but you can’t. How is your result?”

I showed the text message Ammar sent me. “Not bad. You wanna know mine?” He showed me his results. He handed over his cell phone.

I replied “I’m sorry for your result. I’m sorry for troubling you. I’m sorry for being a jerk” his results were the same grades as mine with the exception of his Arabic Language got A. “But I still envy you for your Arabic results” I added.

He just smiled. We continued on to walk.

********************

“Why are you in tears Ameen?” Asked Fallahuddin, a student from Cambodia to me. All the thirty students were on board now. We will start our journey back to Perlis in no time.

“Ouh. Something was caught in my eyes just now. Maybe dirt or something” I carved a fake smile trying to hide my sadness.

He smiled back at me and sat behind my seat.

I looked outside the bus, gazing beyond the buildings and streets of Kuala Lumpur.

“I was upset truly by my results, annoyed, angry, irritated you name it but why should that feeling possess my body and soul? It is normal for one to feel that way but it is abnormal for one to act stupid like what I did. Why should I let them take control, take over me? Who am I? What am I? I’m a Muslim student who wants Allah’s Redha, Allah’s forgiveness. Letting negative feelings is not what I was taught to do.”

“How was your result?”

Bad… Terrible… Unexpected…

“Did you do your best Ameen?”

Yes I did. But it is still bad.

“How are feeling now?”

Honestly I feel miserable but I’ll try to cheer my heart up.

“Have you forgotten what Allah said?”

No I haven’t but I read it every day in Al-Mathurat. I believe that Allah will not burden me with something I cannot bear:

“On no soul doth Allah Place a burden greater than it can bear. It gets every good that it earns, and it suffers every ill that it earns. (Pray:) “Our Lord! Condemn us not if we forget or fall into error; our Lord! Lay not on us a burden Like that which Thou didst lay on those before us; Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Blot out our sins, and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. Thou art our Protector; Help us against those who stand against faith.” Al-Baqarah: 286

“Can you bear the pain?”

Yes… Slowly building the strength.

“Why Allah gave you such pain to you?”

I know Allah loves me through His saying:

“Whatever misfortune happens to you, is because on the things your hands have wrought, and for many (of them) He grants forgiveness.” As-Syuraa: 30

Allah gave bitterness in my heart to forgive my sins. I admit that I’ve fulfill my life with so many sins.

“Is this the end of the world for you?”

No, it’s not the end of the world. I have to stand even though standing is hard.

“Do you believe in what he has given to you?”

Yes. Because there is light at the end of that dark cave, “Verily, with every difficulty there is relief.” Ash-Sharh (94): 6

Having a conversation with myself gives me some inspiration and motivation. Yeah, I believe what is said by Bro Amru, “it is not the end of the world” yet.

I have to explore the world yet to be. SPM is only a portion of the key to success; there are many other keys to achieve my goal. SPM is not everything and losing a battle in SPM doesn’t mean you’ve lost totally.

“Yo SPM! Whenever you knock me down, I will not stay on the ground! I will fight for forever!”

“I will find that key of mine and no doors will be closed for me!”

********************

My next class, Introduction to Psychology class is at HS LR 9 near HS Square. I’m now arriving at class.

I opened the door but no one was there. I looked at my watch, still 5 minutes to 10.00 am. I entered the lecture room and sat at my normal chair.

I leaned back, relaxed my body and inhaled all the air I can in my lungs. I burst it all out once.

“Suria KLCC and SPM huh? That was a long time ago. Now I’m in University I was dying to enter and taking the program that I always wanted since I was form three.” I said to myself.

“I failed once but I learnt from my mistakes. I was not enrolled in IIUM using my SPM but it worked with STAM. I really believe that if you try to strive with all your heart, you can realize a dream that was only a myth before this.”

“Why did I fall?”

“I fall to learn to pick up myself back up again.”

The door opened, the lecturer entered. My classmates were entering one by one. Class was going to start any minute now.

I brought out my note book.

I scribbled down, “If I can stand back up again, how about you?”

~The End~

"I can't, it's impossible"

2011-03-25T07:57:00.001+08:00

“Nothing is Impossbile”

Picture by Muttaqee @ Masterpiecestudios of flickr

“Can you do it?” Asks A to B.

“I can’t, it’s difficult” says B to A.

“Have you tried?” Asks A to reaffirm.

“Yeah, I have but still, I CAN’T, IT’S IMPOSSIBLE” retorts B again.

It is an often phrase you mighthave heard right? Well, actually, these two phrases I regard as among the most famous phrases one may utter.

And because of this phrase alone, many people have suffered the consequences. This phrase has become the root of failure the Ummah is enduring now. This phrase has made us WEAK now.

These words uttered are the result of feeling “You can’t do it” but actually this feeling is an illusion, a mirage, a delusion, a hallucination, a fantasy, whatever you may say it but the point is, it is actually NOT REAL! This is indeed the outcome of Satan who managed to “disabled”our minds and made us feel “I can’t, it’s impossible.”

For more of this post, please visit Langit Ilahi ^_^

You Smile, I Smile ...^_^...

2011-03-19T20:55:00.001+08:00

“Smiles…”
Picture by Muttaqee Misran a.k.a Masterpiecestudios of flickr.com/masterpiecestudios

Since I was a kid until now, many people kept on telling me something that in a sense makes me feel disturbed and irritated. I know that they are telling me the truth. But it’s just I don’t like it. I don’t feel anger or contempt but my feelings are bothered a bit.

What did they say to me?

This is what they said to me “Your smile is not that sweet…” and then comparing the ‘taste’ of my smile with others. As if my smile has lack of sugar and more salt. To a point, I feel like not smiling at all due to the ‘lack of sugary’ taste in my smile. Every time they say this to me, I will give a smirk, a grin, a fake controlled smile as if I don’t feel anything.

But as time passes, I managed to actually shield myself from this sarcasm and to an extent, I don’t care what people might say about my smile, I don’t care about what people may critic me, I believe in my smile because this what Allah has asked me to do. I let it all go, because after every rainfall must come a rainbow. Right? If I can convert what I feel in words, it will sound like this “Who cares about your verdicts? Keep your critics to yourself.”

So, you smile, I’ll smile. I smile, you’ll smile.

For more of this post, please visit Langit Ilahi ^_^

Notes of my heart...

2011-03-07T06:59:00.002+08:00

“White rose…”
Picture by Muttaqee Misran @ masterpiecestudios

When I woke up from my slumber, I saw you leaving…

“Where are you going?” I asked, puzzled.

“I’m going far” you replied short, as you opened the unlocked door.

“Wait! I have so much to explore!!” I cried as you were exiting the house.

“No…No…Don’t go” I begged. Before closing the door, you gave me a smile…Then you left…

I got up and rushed towards the door, “It’s locked!!” I couldn’t open it because ‘The key is with you’ … There’s nothing I can do… Only prayers that will become true…

For more of this post, visit Langit Ilahi ^_^

I'm bored...

2011-02-11T21:07:00.002+08:00

“New born…”
Picture by wolveskeeper of deviantart.com

6 HOURS I have been stretching my neck in front of my Aspire 4310 notebook. It is already 3 o’clock in the morning but sleeping was a myth. Why? I do not know what to read and write. I am working on my research paper titled “Abolish Bumiputera Policy”, but I kept on erasing all the lame words I have typed. Ideas were not flowing as usual. Everything was bad. Only 3 days for date line. For years I have been trying to gain my word power in writing, but all the hard work all these years were helpless. I am beginning to feel fed up.

“Yeah, I’m bored, too bored man!” Got up from the chair I seated, went to my personal dressing mirror the size of a human. “I have not polished the mirror lately, it looks a bit smudged.” I looked into my self. From head to toe, I scanned trough. “I’m physically fine and ready” said to myself. But what is wrong with me? What is making me bored?

For more of this post please visit langitilahi.com

For My Love...

2011-02-04T05:59:00.002+08:00

“It is your light that we need”

Picture by ~Karumis of deviantart.com

For My Love

Langit Ilahi English Column - 4 February 2011
by: Ameen Misran

To whom it may concern,

I’ve known you for so long. From the day I could walk till the moment I’m writing this letter of my heart.

I don’t know what to say actually and I feel a bit nervous writing this letter. I don’t know whether you will read this. But if you’re ever to read this, it would be one of the greatest wonderful memories I will ever have!

The English proverb may say “To err is human” but in my collection of proverbs says “Wallahi you are perfect!”

For more of this post, please visit Langit Ilahi!

Inshallah in Malay by Maher Zain

2011-01-31T12:01:00.001+08:00

Maher Zain in IIUM
picture by firdausmahadi.com

I don’t know what to say actually, but I think I’m in LOVE with Maher Zain. LOVE not in the sense that I favour his physical attributes, but because he is a muslim singer spreading the ultimate code in life! Mashaallah!

According to hadith:

Narrated Anas ibn Malik:

A man was with the Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) and a man passed by him and said: Apostle of Allah! I love this man. The Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) then asked: Have you informed him? He replied: No. He said: Inform him. He then went to him and said: I love you for Allah's sake. He replied: May He for Whose sake you love me love you! [1]

May Allah always make you firm in spreading Islam to the world, Maher Zain.

A present from Maher Zain and crew, Maher Zain’s song, Inshaallah in Malay.

You can also download the mp3 here http://www.mediafire.com/?tlib6j4sy8cnh9e

Beautiful song, beautiful translation, beautiful meaning.

Song: Inshaallah in Malay
Singer: Maher Zain
Translator: Unknown

Andainya..

Kau rasa tak berupaya
Hidup sendirian tiada pembela
Segalanya suram, bagai malam yang gelap
tiada bantuan, tiada tujuan

Janganlah berputus asa..
Kerana Allah bersamamu..

[chorus]

InsyaAllah... InsyaAllah...
InsyaAllah... Ada Jalannya...

Andainya..
Kesalmu berulang lagi
Bagai tiada ruang untuk kembali
Tika keliru atas kesilapan lalu
Membelenggu hati dan fikiranmu

Janganlah berputus asa...
Kerana Allah bersamamu...

Kembalilah....
Kepada yang esa
Yakin padanya,panjatkanlah doa..
OOoo~ Ya Allah...
Pimpinlah daku dari tersasar
Tunjukkan daku ke jalan yang benar..
Jalan yang benar...Jalan yang benar..
Jalan yang benar...

[Chorus]

[1] Dawud. Book 41. Hadith 5106

Let us RECAP to ADAPT…

2011-01-28T02:29:00.006+08:00

"Appreciate TIME while you have it"

Picture by masterpiecestudios of flickr.com

Let us RECAP to ADAPT…

Langit Ilahi v2 English Column- 28 January 2011

by Ameen Misran

When you are STARVING, remember the Prophet (Peace be upon him) tying two stones to his stomach in the battle of Khandaq.

When becoming ANGRY and SAD, remember the Prophet's (Peace be upon him) control of anger and sadness on the martyrdom of his beloved Uncle HAMZAH.

When losing a TOOTH, remember the Prophet's (Peace be upon him) tooth in the battle of UHUD.

When BLEEDING from any part of the body, remember the Prophet's (Peace be upon him) body covered in blood stoned by the people of TA'IF.

Log in to Langit Ilahi V2 for more of this post :)

May the Blessings of Allah be upon us all :D

Meet us @ Langitilahi.com!

2011-01-24T17:06:00.004+08:00

Meet us @ Langitilahi.com!

Assalamualaikum…

It’s been 4 weeks since my last post on this blog. Feels like already full of spider webs.

I have an announcement to make actually, early this year (1/1/2011), my friends and I have started a new website that is ww.langitilahi.com. For the time being, we name this site Langit Ilahi V2.

What is it Langit Ilahi V2?

The sole pioneer of this project is my best friend that is Hilal Asyraf. He is a young novelist, motivator and a student in University of Yarmouk, Jordan. He is the owner and developer of his website that is www.ms.langitilahi.com

I was invited by him to be the writer of the English Column. Inshaallah, I will share what I can. You can click here to view Langit Ilahi v2.

The future of www.seekforthelight.blogspot.com?

Starting on 1/1/2011, I have officially become the writer in charge of the English Column. I will share my articles every Friday. I will try and post poems and short stories on Saturday.

Regarding my blog, I will seldom update it; I will spend more time on Langit Ilahi V2. I will only post one quarter of my article on Langit Ilahi V2 on this blog. If I have the time, I will produce new posts on my blog.

Why?

Because I’m afraid I can’t sustain two sites at the same time. It’s more about my limitation as a student and as a writer, time constrain that is L

More info on Langit Ilahi V2

Langit Ilahi V2 is a website that is run by a collective number of writers.

Monday: Hilal Asyraf [Motivation]

Tuesday: Abu Umar [Life]

Wednesday: BroHamzah [Himmah]

Thursday: Abu Ridwan [Youth]

Friday: Ameen Misran [English Column]

Saturday: Creative Writing

Sunday: Tengku Fahmi [Photography], Afiq Nasyiron dan Rafi' [Comic], Langit IlahiTVshow [Video].

To view the blogs or sites of all the columnist, you can just click their sites on the right side of this blog under Langit Ilahi Team.

So Meet us @ Langit Ilahi V2 now!

May Allah Bless us all!

Hang in there!

2010-12-25T10:00:00.001+08:00

"When you're hurt I'm hurt as well" Picture of Hilal

Hang in there!

By: Ameen Misran

*A post dedicated to Hilal Asyraf
But for all of us to share along...

I’m sorry to hear that you’re ill,
I’m sorry because I just stood still,
I’m sorry because I didn’t do anything,
I just watched from far that you’re suffering.

This time distance really plays its part,
across the Indian Ocean we are apart,
you may not be in my sight,
but you are always in my heart.

What is most important is to stay strong,
cope with the hard times that seems so long,
the world may seem black for you,
but the other side of the sun is still shining for you,
difficulties arise in the lives of us all,
Stand firm and do not make that fall!

You’ve touched many of peoples heart,
you’ve made them from total ignorance to making a start,
in the times like this, it takes a strong person,
but I know, you are that strong person!

In my life, I’ve never called you “Akhi”
this is where this starts Akhi,
stay firm although in tight,
Hang in there! Don't lose sight!

Remember back these verses Akhi,

“Thee (alone) we worship”,
“Thee (alone) we ask for help” [1]

“Do men imagine that they will be left (at ease) because they say, We believe, and will not be tested with affliction?”
“Lo! We tested those who were before them. Thus Allah knoweth those who are sincere, and knoweth those who feign,” [2]

“Lo! We have placed all that is in the earth as an ornament thereof that we may try them: which of them is best in conduct” [3]

Please akhi, follow back how our prophet dealt with sickness,

Narrated by 'Abdullah:

I visited Allah's Apostle while he was suffering from a high fever. I said, "O Allah's Apostle! You have a high fever." He said, "Yes, I have as much fever as two men of you." I said, "Is it because you will have a double reward?" He said, "Yes, it is so. No Muslim is afflicted with any harm, even if it were the prick of a thorn, but that Allah expiates his sins because of that, as a tree sheds its leaves." [4]

So... beginning today and
lasting a lifetime through --
Hang in there! And don't
be afraid to feel like the
morning sun is shining...
just for you, Akhi.

[1] The Glorious Qur’an Surah Al-Fatihah: 5

[2] The Glorious Qur’an Surah Al-Ankabut: 2-3

[3] The Glorious Qur’an Surah Al-Kahf: 7

[4] Bukhari :: Book 7 :: Volume 70 :: Hadith 551

THE BEAUTY OF NATURE YOU SHOULD BE AWARE OF

2010-12-21T00:20:00.000+08:00

"Allah is too GREAT..."

Picture by masterpiecestudios a.k.a my big bro

THE BEAUTY OF NATURE YOU SHOULD BE AWARE OF

By: Ameen Misran

“Subhanallah!” I shouted with all my heart as soon as I got out of our car. My friends and I have arrived at the seaside of OBS Sekakap Mersing, Johor, a wonderful place. We came here as facilitators to a camp by the name of KMK (Kem Minda Kreatif).

“A program must consist of three M’s: Meaningful, Memorable and Motivating” once said by Sir Mustafa Kamil bin Shaharom, an experienced motivator and also once my xifu.

Yeah…When something is meaningful to you, it will be memorable. The memory of the meaningful experienced you’ve undergone will become a catalyst that motivates you all the way inshallah. That is why the three M is significant.

To me, what was most meaningful, memorable and motivating was the beauty of the place. The breeze, the sky, the clouds, the thunderstorms and the insects are all sources of beauty you should be aware of.

The breeze is lovely. Have you ever felt it? Every morning, I will go out and feel the breeze that caresses my face and cools my body. The breeze is a symbol of nature and it is simply beautiful. It is a gift from ALLAH -- free for mankind but not everyone is aware of its presence.

“We did not create the heavens and the earth and everything between them as a game. We did not create them except with truth but most of them do not know it” [1]

When we gaze at the sky, sometimes it is immensely blue, but white silver clouds never fails to wheel against it. Allah paints a picture out of these puzzling jigsaw pieces made up of passing clouds that are never the same as they change continuously. Allah has made this scene more and more attractive and the beauty depends on the observer. In reality, they can be more stunning than what I have perceived.

When the sky turns black with thick heavy clouds from a distance, curtains of falling rain can be seen. It appears as though an unseen hand is pouring water onto the lands to nourish them. This image is so striking that it makes me feel closer to the beauty of Allah.

After a downpour, the air is crisp and refreshing. Creatures come to life. Birds sing with joy. The frogs croak merrily. The bees buzz blissfully as they do their work. Even the insects seem to shriek louder. I am so amused by the rhythm made by these creatures making me sing along on the wet grass. I am sure that they are all praising ALLAH on the handsome life HE granted.

As the sun sets, the moon takes its tack. Sometimes the moon appears round, sometimes crescent-shaped. Whatever the shape may be, its presence adds to the beauty of the backdrops of stars in the far reaches of space. It is amazing that there are such things, unimaginable, unless you are an observer.

When night comes, the stars rule the sky. Millions of these twinkling jewels can be seen in the black sky. How else could we see the wonders of the universe? The scene is gorgeous indeed. But the Creator of the universe is far more Gorgeous than that. HE can Create and Manage the universe. We are such tiny dusts! We then should realize that we are no match to ALLAH.

Look at the world around you, filled with wonders. Little bees, butterflies, and others fly among the flowers in search of food. The flowers themselves are brightly colored with every possible combination of hues. I feast my eyes on the beauty of Nature’s countless wonders making me reflect what Allah said:

“Have they not reflected within themselves? Allah did not create the heavens and the earth and everything between them except with truth and for a fixed term. Yet many people reject the meeting with their Lord.” [2]

The beauty of nature is just a small portion from the beauty of ALLAH. It is so simple and undemanding that we often fail to perceive it. It is so automatic that we often take them for granted. Many people feel the wonders of nature but few relate them to the wonders of ALLAH. It is actually a blessing to be able to smell roses, to touch the morning dew, and listen to songs of the birds but do not forget these are signs for us to be closer to the CREATOR.

In pursuit for us to understand the greatness of Allah through His creations, I highly recommend you a book by Harun Yahya titled “Deep Thinking”. May the Blessings of Allah Be upon you and me.

[1] Surah Ad-Dukhan: 38-39

[2] Surah Ar-Rum: 8

Love Gone Wrong

2010-12-17T08:02:00.000+08:00

Love Gone Wrong
By: Ameen Misran

When love comes out of the blue…
It always seems to be true...
But when you need that love to come through...

It will abandon you…
That Love will blind you...
No one can find you…

You’ll be ignored by friends...[1]
And break what were to be long lasting mends...
Maybe until your life ends!!!

That love will always hurt...
When it throws you in the dirt…

You claim Valentine’s Day, as the day for your loved one…

Florists make money quadruple times more than usual…

You stare hours at your love one at a particular restaurant…

Ignoring the other ten couples doing the exact same thing!

You say “I love you, honey!” to show passion…
You cry “My life is for you, sweetheart!” to show devotion…
You utter “Darling, loving you is like food to my soul!” to show affection…
You declare “You are everything for me, my sweetie pie!” to show adoration…

So easy to utter, so easy to say…
But very hard to convey…
You say “I love you”…
but did it come true?

Is your LOVE true LOVE?
Is it as lovely as the dove?
Or you’re just being pretentious…
You say it, but you don’t mean it, you’re just being ridiculous…

It was never the TRUE LOVE to begin with…

It was just a mere myth…

Acting like a special gift…

But when TRUE LOVE is there...
It feels like a sunny day...
It will save your day...

Many people look everywhere...
and never notice THE ONE is there….

All you have to do is be aware!!!

[1] إنَّ شَرَّ النَّاسِ مَنْزِلةً عِنْدَ اللهِ يَوْمَ القِيَامَةِ مَن يَتْرُكُهُ النَّاسُ لِاتِّقَاءِ فُحْشِهِ

Al-Bukhari (6054 and 3132), Muslim (6539).

Seek for the LIGHT

Goodbye my blog!

English Column: How’s your Ramadan?

Help me! I’m slowing down!

English Column: Our hopes in Ramadan

Let’s get ready to rumble!

English Column: Lose Yourself in Ramadan

English Column: A love greater than Allah’s love

Marriage is mirage

TAQWA: The "Boring" Weekly Call

“See what happens when we miss an important call” Picture by *04young of Deviantart.com

Have you swallowed a dictionary?

The battle to heaven

Bachelor of Taqwa from University of Ramadan

This is your final Ramadan!

The sky is cryin', are you?

Just say "I don't know" will ya?

Best in the world

“Find the key…” Picture by by ~endrju100

I don't know, I just don't know

Leaving our LOVE behind....

I am waiting for you...

"I'm waiting for you"Picture by LittlePrince83 of flickr.com

I waited for that person to come…I waited for that person to knock my door…I waited and waited endlessly…

Countless hours passed but still no sign…No one came, no footsteps were heard… Quiet and silent… “When will that time come? When will that person come?” I asked myself… I'm still waiting...for you...

I don’t want your smile to fade away!

The Way We Were Picture by *mebilia

The Way We Were Picture by *mebilia

They need us or we need them?

A moment for me to ponder… A moment for you to remember…

“FIFA VS FIFA”

Inspiration, Aspiration and Perspiration

Bring that Peace, Break the siege!

I will never stand down!

"Stand Tall" by Picture ~Dshark of deviantart.com

Even if you knock me down,even if you take over my crown,even though you cut all my hands and feet,even though you take my ability to see and speak,I will never, ever stand down!

Anger is power?

It's not the end of the world

"I can't, it's impossible"

You Smile, I Smile ...^_^...

Notes of my heart...

I'm bored...

For My Love...

Inshallah in Malay by Maher Zain

Let us RECAP to ADAPT…

Meet us @ Langitilahi.com!

Hang in there!

THE BEAUTY OF NATURE YOU SHOULD BE AWARE OF

Love Gone Wrong

“See what happens when we miss an important call”
Picture by *04young of Deviantart.com

"I'm waiting for you"
Picture by LittlePrince83 of flickr.com

Countless hours passed but still no sign…
No one came, no footsteps were heard…
Quiet and silent…

“When will that time come? When will that person come?” I asked myself…
I'm still waiting...for you...

The Way We Were
Picture by *mebilia

The Way We Were
Picture by *mebilia

Even if you knock me down,
even if you take over my crown,
even though you cut all my hands and feet,
even though you take my ability to see and speak,
I will never, ever stand down!